The Intro: About the Author

 So I decided to do something crazy...

At 25, overweight, not a friend in sight, and with no relationship experience I finally had enough. I looked up and was somber at how much life had already passed me, and scared about what I thought the rest of my life would look like. I wanted to change but had no real stamina to actually get the job done. I'm not talking about physical stamina. I'm talking about mental stamina. The ability to just keep going, period. Couple that with insecurities that were ingrained in me as a child, and constantly comparing myself to my much more attractive, smaller, and fearless twin sister, and we have a problem....Me. 

    I battled for years trying to get the weight off. Mainly because I want to be in a relationship. Okay, maybe not even a relationship. I just want to have a man yall! So embarked on trying to do them all simultaneously. Get the weight off, get back in school, kick depression's butt out of my life, and move away from my safety net of a home. I was kicking and screaming to get out of my hometown. It was cool for my childhood. But now as an adult, I wanted to experience....Experiences. Some say that this is the danger of growing up in the church and also being a pastors kid. And I would say that it is to an extent. I love God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. I loved my church, family and friends. But I always played it safe. Always just sticking around family and doing what I am told, even though if you asked my parents they would say I was stubborn. And that went on for years until my brother died. When he passed away from an overdose at 25, and I watched the nurse start unhooking him from the life support machines, every memory of my boring life hit me like a ton of bricks. The fact that my brother and I never resolved our issues. I never got to say sorry for not understanding his addiction.But if I am being honest, I did understand his addiction. Because I am an addict. A food addict.  I struggled admitting the hypocrisy that I belived he was worse off than me, even though we both struggled with addiction. Meth was his choice and food was mine. Meth fast tracked his life, and food will ultimately be the slow burn that also takes my life if I choose not to get it together. That got deep huh? But thats the real. 

So I picked myself up. Got back into school (which is another story for another day) and got 2 AA degrees, and transferred to a four year university- University of California Santa Barbara (UCSB). And in fact gained more weight instead of loosing it. This is where the journey picks up in the present. Living day to day in a new city. Living with some great and really young people. The average student age is 19. I am 28. So this is a big change for me. However, I have embraced it as best I can, and really want life to continue to pick up. I want to learn to surf, explore the area, graduate college, study abroad, go on a date, have my first kiss with an amazing man, and loose this weight before I turn 30. 

I know its alot, but a girl can dream right?!

 Thanks for joining the ride. I hope it inspires you, makes you laugh, and think about making a bolder move in life. And to keep moving no matter what. Plus size and all!